Lessons I Learned in my 39th Year on Earth

Lesson 4:  There is a gaping abyss between wisdom and common sense.  Wisdom without common sense is completely useless. 

I’m not ashamed to admit that I’ve spent several decades of my life on a personal quest for wisdom.  The bookshelves of my home are cluttered beyond recognition with the mounds of self-help books I’ve consulted during this never-ending search.  I’ve read the  Bible into the wee hours of the night trying to unlock the secrets to a happy life, and paid for endless trips to the therapist in an effort to get in touch with that “inner child” that might release the mystic secret to wisdom.  At the end of that quest, I have learned one thing.  Having common sense is equally if not more important, and there are a lot of people out there lacking it. 

About a month ago my daughter broke her arm in two places.  It was ironic because it happened during a game of “Fruit of the Spirit” freeze tag at church… just another reminder that the devil is always lurking in the shadows, trying to steal our joy.

Like all good mothers, I practically ignored the situation.  I strapped an ice pack on her arm, crammed an ibuprofen down her throat, and told her to go to bed.  The next day, when things still weren’t better, I asked my mom to take her to the doctor, who promptly made an appointment for her to get an x-ray at Vanderbilt early the next morning. 

Their famous last words were, “You’re appointment is at 7:00.  It won’t take ten minutes.  You can still have her to school on time!”  Check me on this, but have you ever known of a hospital that has people in and out in ten minutes?  It usually takes me ten minutes to find the right entrance.  If I ever have a life threatening situation at home I’ll definitely pay the ambulance bill instead of driving myself the two blocks to Vanderbilt because I’m convinced I’d bleed to death while trying to find my way in.  Getting into a hospital without the aid of GPS is like trying to navigate your way out of a 7 acre corn maze.  You better have PLENTY of time on your hands.   

The reporter in me started wondering if Vanderbilt had installed a drive-thru x-ray machine in the parking lot that I was unaware of.  Surely we would have done a story on that!  If not… we should.  Unfortunately there will be no story.  The magic drive-thru x-ray machine is the subject of folklore, and as expected, we were there for three and a half hours.  What struck me most that day wasn’t the absence of the magic machine, but the lack of common sense we have running around among us.  It’s truly worse than I thought.

As we were standing at the check-in rattling off information to the super nice lady behind the counter she asked me if my daughter had ever been there before.  I proudly said no, only to have her look at me like I had somehow escaped from the nearby psych ward.  She lowered her glasses to make sure we were making eye contact and said a second time, “So you’re telling me… your daughter has never been admitted here before.”  To which I reply, “ah… not that I’m aware of.”  To which she pauses for what seemed like forever and responded, “You’d be surprised,” before dismissing us to the lobby.

What exactly would I be surprised by?  Is it possible that people take their children to the hospital and have no recollection of it?  Do people sneak other people’s children to the hospital on overnight stays and never reveal this information to the parent?  I was really stumped by this, as was my daughter when I began interrogating her in the bathroom as to whether she had ever been here without my consent. 

A half hour later the nice lady called us up to the counter where she asked us to repeat our information.  After putting it into the computer database she looked up and said, “I’ll be darn.  You’re right.  She’s never been admitted.”  I KNOW THAT.  This is my child… flesh and blood.

I know I should have just moved along with my day, but this was just too much to ignore.  So I said, “I’ve been thinking about this the whole time we’re sitting here.  Do you mean to tell me there are parents out there who bring their children to the emergency room and somehow DON’T remember?”  To which she said, “Honey… you’d be surprised!” 

That’s it.  I’m sold.  Humans, as a race, are unconscionably stupid.  There’s no need for further evidence.  The whole thing actually reminded me of a bumper sticker I saw a while back that said, “If ignorance is bliss… why aren’t there happy people in the world?”  At the time, I thought it was funny and posted it on Facebook, but now I’m somehow depressed by the revelation that the bumper sticker was profound.  King Solomon might as well have uttered it himself. 

So I leave you with this on this sunny September day… in our constant pursuit of wisdom let’s not forget the little things, like turning your car off when you get where you’re going.  Just start there and build.  The path to greatness is achieved one step at a time.

 
Recommended Reading:  The Bible: Ecclesiastes

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